Carol A. Bender Children's Author Extraordinaire

Generous bloggers

2012-02-25T05:08:00.000-05:00

I've been in a creative funk where procrastination is Queen. I spent some time reading other blogs and am relieved to see that it's not just me. Phew! Apparently the collective consensus is that February is to blame. I can't force my creativity, so when these funks happen I have to find a way around them, just like everybody else.

I haven't lost my spark all together.

One of my goals in the near future is to make a book trailer. Do you need to do that too? I am so thankful for the generous bloggers who share their knowledge. Rachelle Gardner posted guest blogger Julie Cantrell's tips on making a book trailer. Click on the high lighted words if this is information you could use as well. I love Julie's trailer for her book "Into the Free", very impressive. I hope you enjoy it too.

Feeling thankful and honored

2012-02-02T14:41:00.006-05:00

What a nice surprise to find that Marcie Colleen from The Write Routine nominated little ol me for this award.

Check out her blog. She has an awesome new post reminding us writers to save

our work.

Maybe you are wondering what this award is all about.

The word Liebster is German, in English it means beloved, dear, dearest, or love. Awww, to be loved and appreciated, isn't that what we all want?

Today I am a winner. Marcie loved my blog and passed the crown to me.

The Liebster Award is given to lovable blogs with less than 200 followers to recognize worthiness and drive more readers to them.... and hopefully generate higher Follower numbers. I am thankful for all the followers I have and for future followers as well.

As a recipient I am supposed to list 5 tidbits about myself that others may not know. I adjust my crown and begin...

1. I love excuses to be happy and childlike (not childish).

2. I prefer small groups to large crowds.

3. My favorite song is "American Pie"

4. I prefer the commercials over the football game.

5. I am not competing with anyone, just trying to be who I want to be.

I am most excited about choosing the next 5 recipients of this award. I met all these wonderful bloggers through the recent comment challenge I participated in. A huge THANKS to SCBWI , Lee Wind, and MotherReader for bringing this to my attention when I was REALLY REALLY ready to hear it.

And my nominees are:

1. Helena Juhasz an awesome illustrator who brought many smiles to my face.

2. Bill Kirk a fellow grandparent who like myself loves writing and empowering children.

3. HardyGirl aka Sarah Frances Hardy and not just because she has a cool last name like I do. Just check out her blog and her recently published book. She is amazing.

4. Madigan McGillicuddy because this woman can READ, and I'm thankful that she shares her wonderful insights.

5. Last, but certainly not least is Annie who shares a wealth of information to any and all writers out there.

I hope everyone finds some way to feel loved today AND notices how lovable those around you are!

choices

2012-01-16T06:50:00.000-05:00

I am so happy and grateful for all the choices I have.

Like everyone, I've had to overcome adversity before, and I will probably have to overcome it again.

I am so thankful for the comment challenge because it helps me see other views. Some times brighter ones than I was having.

Throw a coin in the wishing well with me.....I'm wishing that everyone has a wonderful view of life on this cold, but gorgeous Monday.

Lazy Library day learning new things

2012-01-11T18:24:00.001-05:00

On Wednesdays I volunteer at the Lebanon, Ct. elementary school library. I love volunteering, it helps me know which books the kids enjoy. I usually have a few minutes in the library, all by my lonesome, before the librarian returns from her lunch, and before the kids arrive. This is when I feel like... well... like me in a candy store.While putting books away many catch my eye. Today it was the book "Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs" by Judi Barrett.

Maybe you've read it?!

Maybe you've seen the movie?!

It is really a very imaginative story. What really caught my eye was that it was published in 1978. I was so surprised. I did not know this before today. The movie didn't come out until 2009. I did the math - that's 31 years!

Doesn't that seem like a long time for a book to become a movie? I'm sure it doesn't always happen this way.

I was a little worried that the original author might be out of the picture - so to speak. We've overcome many obstacles in 2010 so please forgive my knee jerk paranoia in thinking that someone waited for her to die so that they wouldn't have to pay her.

I looked Judi up and I am happy to report back to you that according to my sources (Google) she is alive and well, living in NY and possibly teaching art to students in Elementary school. I say possibly because some schools are still losing art programs because of budget cuts. A Judi Barrett who sells real estate also came up when I googled so I don't want to mislead anyone.

I'm kidding around here because the story the substitute librarian read to the kids was about a lie o meter...to teach the children the difference between exaggerations and the truth.

One little boy spoke up and admitted that he lies every day...we chuckled that at least he was honest about that. It reminded me of Mark Twain.

weekend plots

2012-01-08T20:58:00.000-05:00

Sisters know each other in ways that nobody else can. We shared not only parents, siblings, and relatives, but secrets, desires, feelings, and fears. We harassed and then supported one another. Protected one another and then put ourselves in dangerous situations. My sister is just 13 months older than I am. She is light haired and dark eyed. I am light eyed and dark haired. We are opposites who are similar. I love a good paradox. We love and accept one another.

We got together this weekend, not only to share memories but also to plot out a YA novel to work on together. It's still in the planning stages so I can't share too much. It will definitely be spooky, sexy and controversial. All names will be changed to protect the guilty, of course.

Oh shoot, I already mentioned us.

Imagination and choices

2012-01-05T22:52:00.000-05:00

I woke up the other morning and had to grab my camera. I wish I could have done a better job capturing the Alfred Hitchcock style, bird's eye view, I was getting.

That wasn't it. It was more like this....

I know this picture doesn't do justice to what I was seeing. I'm not a professional photographer so you will just have to believe me when I tell you that these little black birds were so plentiful that it made me think of Alfred's story "The Birds".

Alfred Hitchcock is not to be confused with the makers of Hitchcock furniture. I overheard a young woman comment "Didn't he make spooky movies?!" when a Chair went up for bid at an auction once. I smiled. I try not to get upset with people for not knowing what they don't know, especially if they are young. It's why education is so important. I know I'm still learning many things.

The grandchildren were visiting a few days ago. My granddaughter said "hey, look it's a heart" when she bit into the apple. What a nice message from the universe. Fruit AND candy are available in my house. I'm not a fanatic about being healthy just because my picture book "Picky Eater that Peter" is about making healthy choices. I think it's great to have both as long as you don't over do it. Think I'm kidding? Go ahead and eat too much fruit and see what happens.

An apple a day keeps the doctor away...and I think chocolate every day keeps the head doctor away but that is just my opinion.

I love the imagination of a happy little four year old. When intentions are good, imagination is a wonderful thing, it's where great ideas come from. They have to start somewhere.

Blessings

2011-12-13T16:56:00.000-05:00

I blessed someone who sneezed today and I quickly made a disclaimer that I wasn't sure how much good my blessing was worth since I am a sinner. It's not like I TRY to sin every day or anything, but temptation has a reputation for a reason. I write fiction, so I am telling lies pretty much every day. It could be worse. I could be a politician, big corporation, or food processing plant telling lies with bad intent. Am I just minimizing?!

I am so thankful for Lee Wind and the awesome job he is doing with the SCBWI blog.
His happy and informative posts brighten my life more than he will ever know, unless of course he stumbles upon this post then he will figure it out. He looks very bright.

Please go comment on the teaching authors blog to help put books into the hands of children who need them.

Have a very merry holiday and a happy new year. I'm going off line to read some books now.

Roses in December

2011-12-12T10:52:00.000-05:00

Is it some kind of miracle that here in Lebanon, Ct. I have roses in December?

I also have chickens on my porch but I guess that doesn't actually fall into the anything is possible category either.

I have some really great news for everyone.

My picture book is available and can be ordered in time to give as a holiday gift.

It's more important than ever for children to keep reading, and learning. It's not just all about having the books so you can show off that you have the latest and greatest one. You actually get more enjoyment if you open it up and read it too. The reason I mention this is because I've noticed both kinds of children lately. I have more hope for the child who reads the books but that is just my opinion.

Looking for some sad news?

2011-12-07T14:14:00.000-05:00

I've been accused of sharing only my "wins" and happy news, so for all the people who would prefer to hear that I don't always win - this story is for you.

I was very excited about reading my children's book Picky Eater that Peter at the Lebanon town library. Every thing was scheduled in advance. Ads were place in Lebanon Life and posters in the library itself for all patrons to view. I am very thankful to the librarians for all their hard work. Oh, sorry about still being thankful, it's a habit.

I had cookies, raisins, colored pencils and bookmarks.

Not a single child showed up to hear my story.

The town librarian said that it was not the first time this has happened to an author. I guess I can be thankful that I didn't have far to travel. Sorry, about that, there I go again, boy the Grinch would really be pissed at me right about now wouldn't he?

I don't know why this happened, but we joked that Jesus had to leave his hometown to be heard too (I'm not implying that I'm Jesus, please don't lock me up). Stuff happens, what are you gonna do?

I decided to blog about it, not to share my misery or look for sympathy but just to spread joy to those who love other people's misery. I know a few of those people. I'm so happy I can add a little something to make their day too.

It kind of sucked for my grandson Damien. He was my model for the picture book and part of the inspiration. When he saw the posters last week he said "I guess I'm going to have to get used to being a local celebrity." Oh well, we may have to wait a bit on that I guess.

We have time. I still have a lot to be thankful for.

Writer's network

2011-12-01T04:08:00.000-05:00

Monday night I attended an amazing writer's network at the Wethersfield public library. I love writers. I love libraries, and I need help with the networking part. I was going to post this Tuesday morning but my husband said the word "auction" and I got distracted. Wednesday was filled with running around and volunteering at the school library. Better late than never, right?

What an amazing group of speakers. So much information and opportunities.
I took notes, business cards were handed out and I even got this cool promotional item, pen.

I hope it's not too creepy that I put the pen on top of my book so that I could do a little promotion of my own is it? Oh well, too late, it's done. Could you also look at this picture repeatedly until you feel compelled to buy my book? I could really use the sales and this was one of those "I don't have any money right now", ideas. Thanks

Karen M. Rider, a metaphysical fiction author, was the first speaker. She spoke a little about herself. You can go to her blogspot if you click on her name. She reminded me that research is very important. I loved what she said about approaching everything with an inquiring mind and an open heart. What great advice for any endeavor. I am looking forward to reading some of the blogs she suggested including hers.

Karen's talk was about writing interviews. I have no desire to do this but I have to admit I do fantasize about what I would say in an interview (and I fantasize about the day when someone will actually care to hear what I have to say - is that too honest?).

For those of you who, like Karen, have a desire to write interviews you will be happy to know that instead of hoarding this knowledge Karen shared some great tips. I will share her number one beginning question when making your request or Pitch to do an interview because I really, really love this advice.

#1 tip - Ask yourself what is your purpose for wanting the interview.

Karen also explained how she wants to be a fantastic role model for her two little girls. She chose to leave the meeting early so that she could go home to her daughters for their bedtime routine. Her priorities look like they are in the right order to me. I think she deserves to have it all. She came and gave us the advice she had and she is able to be there for her girls too. What a smart lady. I really enjoyed listening to her. I think I will enjoy following her blog as well.

Raymond Bechard introduced his book "The Berlin Turnpike" next. He spoke about his experience in writing his first novel and also what the editing process was like for him. If you want to see what his book is all about please click on the title and you can read all about it. It's fascinating to get together with other authors and hear about their experiences. Everyone has their own way of getting it done and depending on what phase of the game you are in there is advice to be given or taken. Suggestions and opinions are so bountiful with all the choices given authors and writers in today's market.

Speaking of markets, our next speaker was Robin Lindemann with advice and examples of promotional products for authors in the marketing phase of the game. She gave us each a pen. She has lots of great ideas. I loved hearing her story about the flash drive promotional item she provided for a customer. She does a lot for non-profits and was such a pleasure to sit next to. I didn't tell her because I didn't want her to think I was creepy, but I loved the way she smelled. I probably could have found a noncreepy way to find out what her perfume is but I've been a happy little hermit so long I've been lacking in my social skills. Which brings us to our last, but certainly not least speaker of the night (that sounds creepier than it was, sorry) - Eileen Albrizio.

Eileen spoke to us about the dangers of writing alone, never getting feed back from others can prolong your success. There are many ways, again, depending on where you are in the writing process to seek feed back, advice, and suggestions. You don't have to take ALL the advice of course, that would be confusing, but if you are listening to people who are more experienced and more successful than you are, at something you are just beginning to do, it makes sense that their advice will help you. Eileen offers her services as a creative writing teacher, proofreader, and editor. She also owns and operates a comic book store called Heroes & Hitters on Silas Deane Hwy in Rocky Hill, Ct. How cool is that?

Best silly thanksgiving memory

2011-11-24T07:01:00.000-05:00

Do you have a silly Thanksgiving memory?

At age five Damien wanted to explain to the chicks that they were once this egg.

My favorite funny memory of Thanksgiving is when my oldest grandson, who is now eight, was about three years old. He saw us putting the turkey in the oven and asked.

"Is that a peacock, or something?"

"No, it's a turkey." answered his mom.

" You mean like gobble, gobble?" he asked.

"Yes." we replied.

He looked at us in horror and said "You people are disgusting."

Damien was my model and part of the inspiration for my book "Picky Eater that Peter"
I know it's a lot easier for me because I'm the grandma, not the mom or Dad with a million other worries on my brain, but I believe it is fine to be picky. We just have to have our own best interests at heart in order to make the best choices for ourselves.

Picky Peter doesn't make the best choices for himself in the beginning of the story.

I have a feeling with the guidance Damien receives from his loving parents he will be picky in the right ways. I hope that all young children can make healthy choices for themselves and be aware of how they feel.

It's important to know how you feel. It's important to feel good about yourself. Sometimes children and adults who start worrying and caring too much about what other people think, forget to notice how they are feeling and it makes them vulnerable to those who don't always have their best interest at heart. It's always a balancing act, but the more we are in balance the less we have to act and then we can just enjoy living.

Air head Bender suggests that we listen to some good music (Jessica Prouty Band , hint hint) surround ourselves with those we love, enjoy the good food and have great conversations about all that is good.

I hope everyone finds many things to be thankful for. I believe thankfulness is the quickest path to happy.
Happy Thanksgiving everyone!

Please feel free to share your silly thanksgiving memories in the comments. I love to hear stories as much as I love to tell them.

I'm so excited...

2011-11-22T07:12:00.000-05:00

I know I can be like a little child when I'm happy about something.
I was jump up and down, pee in my pants happy when I received this in the mail yesterday...

I'm so excited but I didn't really pee in my pants, ewww that would have been gross. Funny gross though, and not totally unrealistic given my age. Hey, I already warned you that I'm like a child. A child with a sick sense of humor, that is.

I love everything about this invite. Because this is from the New England section of the SCBWI, the conference is close to home. I'm not a big traveler. The registration opens the day before my birthday (being so self centered I can remember that), and the theme "keeping it real" that is definitely something I need help with.
I also love that there is a pig on the invite. There are pigs in my picture book, "Picky Eater that Peter".

New this year! Eric Carle Museum event full day academies for authors and illustrators. This is like a dream come true for me. I am so there. I even love Eric Carle. In case you wanted to know, my favorite book of his is "The Grouchy Lady Bug" (if you want to hear the story click on the title and you will get a youtube reading). Not me reading it, but I really love to read this book to children. I wonder if the school librarian will let me read that one to the children. I will have to ask.

Do you have a favorite book you like to read to children?

Picky Pumpkin Preparers

2011-10-19T14:33:00.001-04:00

My grandson, Damien, who was also the model for my picture book "Picky Eater that Peter" came over last night and he noticed I had some pumpkins.

Perfect pumpkin pie pumpkins, to be exact. This is his, and my favorite kind of pie. He asked if we could cook them. I am so proud that he asked for what he wanted. He didn't just take it without asking first. My daughter and son in-law do a great job teaching their children manners and respect.

We decided that with a little help from everyone, we would make some pumpkin pie.

Odyn and Aries washing at the kitchen sink.

The first step was to wash, not just the pumpkin, but ourselves. We like to play outside and I think we were even petting some chickens earlier. We didn't want to take any unnecessary safety risks.
I'm not a big fan of rules, but the ones about safety are easier for me to follow.

Most of the work was in preparing the pumpkin. We had a few different choices about how we wanted to cook it. We decided the microwave was our best option. I wasn't sure how much time we would have to finish our project. We also tried to roast some pumpkin seeds but I got busy playing with puppets, fairy wings, and cat costumes. I burned them - oops. Focus, Fefe, Focus!

Ta DA! What? It doesn't look like pie to you?

Well, here's what happened; we got this great recipe off of the internet but then I realized I didn't have any evaporated milk. I thought I had some. Oh well, I guess it must have vaporized...evaporating milk is known to do that. Maybe it will surface again in time for Halloween....oooooo bah ha ha.

I've always been fascinated with how things change form. You know like how water goes from liquid, to solid, or gas. I was doing some little experiments just because I'm an evil woman and I like to change things.

I do that with cooking and decorating all the time. This time I think I got a little carried away.

Oh nooooo! My potion turned Mr. Bender into a pumpkin. I can't be married to a pumpkin! Maybe by midnight he will turn back into a prince. Don't worry, everything is just temporary. I'll find a solution. For now my solution is to keep him for decoration. Bah ha ha - I told you I was an evil woman. I really do admire him in any form.

A writer's week

2011-10-17T22:01:00.000-04:00

Ever since I attended the SCBWI event "Overcoming Challenges" I've been making a concentrated effort to wake each morning at 5am (believe it or not that is usually not the hard part for me) and writing from 5am - 7am, each and every morning. It's a great way for me to start each day. I love to write, so starting each day with what I love to do is PERFECT for me.

This is my "Oh crap, here comes another challenge face." Don't worry, I do not play poker.

I don't even want to talk about the challenges I've had to overcome since I began this journey. If I can get away with it, I just ignore them till they go away. I can't always do that, but I admit it is the preferred method for me.

I am very thankful that my book is out there, getting noticed, and getting reviews. I hope it is getting read, over and over and over. I hope it is being enjoyed!

I am also very thankful that I continue to learn new things each and every day. I meet wonderful people like Melissa Hayes, and Jim Smith. If you write, or have a business to promote you may want to click on their names to see who they are.

Now, if I could just overcome the challenge of submitting my work on a regular basis. I'm working on it, and I'm thankful.

Today is for the birds

2011-10-05T06:57:00.001-04:00

I say that like it's a good thing. I am one of those annoying morning people. I get up with the sun, roosters and this morning the crows.

One of the little guys, hatched by the Vernon, Center Rd. School.

I may get up with the roosters but I can assure you I do not move as quick as this one.

I hear them first....caw .....caw....the sound is eerie but somehow comforting too.

I look up to enjoy the show.

First there was one.... all alone,

but not for too long another flew....

they joined each other, now there were two.

I don't know if it's a planet or a star, but if you look to the left there's a twinkle in the sky.

Yes, today is for the birds....and it's a good thing.

Keeping a promise

2011-09-28T08:59:00.000-04:00

I didn't realize till I was rereading some old posts and basking in the glory of being me, (I have all kinds of moments, don't judge, ok? ) that I needed to keep a promise I made.

This is me having a moment with this guy who got too picky and didn't eat enough - extremes usually don't serve us well.

I promised to share my amazon link with you. My book "Picky Eater that Peter" is and has been available on Amazon.com, Barnes and Noble, and through Outskirts Publishing. Heck, you can even Google it and pay more if you are one of those people who doesn't believe something is valuable unless you pay more money for it. To each his own, I always say, have at it.

I know that times are tough for many people too. I don't want a silly thing like that to keep children from enjoying my book. It has a library of congress control number: 2011931620 and I recently donated a copy of my picture book to the Lebanon Town Library. I am penciled in to read my book to children on Dec.6th 2011. I am so looking forward to that. I have my presentation all ready. I hope they don't mind that I'm silly.

Today I am especially excited because I am volunteering at the elementary school library in Lebanon, Ct.
I know... I know... ME!, in a quiet, library setting. Confession time - I am a chatty Carol, but I can be quiet when I need to respect others. I know that there is a time and a place for everything. It will be fine fun. I am sure.

Writer's workshop with Eileen Albrizio

2011-09-13T09:43:00.001-04:00

I will be the first to admit that I have a problem asking for help.

I used to have this joke when someone asked "Do you need help?"

I would reply, " Yeah, but psychiatrists are so expensive."

I am a yankee, at least that is what I am blaming today for the way I am. Maybe I am just a four year old stuck in an adult body. There are really a million excuses I could come up with. I want to do everything myself, all by myself. It's possible but will only limit how much I will be able to accomplish. We all need help from other people from time to time.

I am new to the writing business. I've been writing and drawing my whole life. I was just doing it for fun and wasn't ready to make it a career. I made real estate a career until Sept. 11, 2001.

Nine eleven woke me up to how short life can be sometimes. I needed to fulfill a dream I had of helping abused and neglected children. I was elated when I switched my career path to human services. I still love houses, and admire those who help other's with their dreams - like when I used to help buyers find their dream homes or sellers sell their nightmare homes. I just love helping children the most.

It wasn't until this year that I decided to make a serious effort to share what I did in secret with others. I'm talking about the writing and drawing here, not the unicorn pj's. Ok, so if you are my face book friend you already know I don't really have any secrets. You can even find pictures of me in my unicorn pjs. I still have a lot to learn, and I need to embrace those opportunities to learn with open arms.

I am so thankful that Eileen Albrizio offered her advice in the form of a writer's workshop entitled "Write what you know or don't know" at the Cragin Memorial Library in Colchester, Ct. and it was FREE to the public. Eileen has more experience in the writing field than I do. She is full of expert advice. She is also a great speaker and full of life and humor. I love happy people.

She let me take her picture.

Ok, so I'm not so good taking indoor pictures when I need to use the flash. By the time the shutter went off Eileen didn't look as happy as she really is.

DO OVER!

That's the real Eileen, smile and all.

Eileen taught me a few new things in her workshop. Sometimes they are not really new things but we need to hear them like ten times or something from all different people before they sink in. I'll be the first to admit that I can be thick headed at times.

Eileen reminded me that I need to plot out my story now that I am trying my hand at chapter books instead of just picture books. It helps to know where you are going so you can actually get there.

I am very grateful to Eileen because I was wondering how I was going to get my work seen by agents and publishers besides just sending them my manuscripts in the mail. I like to do things more than one way if possible, but I don't have a lot of extra money right now for all those cool conferences I keep reading about all over the united states.

Eileen had the answers. Thank you, thank you, did I say THANK YOU!

There are agent meet and greets that are free. She knew about these and shared. I didn't know about the unicorn conference but I knew when she said it that it was perfect for me. I am the old lady who wears unicorn pj's remember? - so it fits.

She was the first to tell me about CT. Muse. I am so excited. Click on the highlighted word if you want to see why. Just remember I warned you that it's exciting.

I hope the library has Eileen back again. I love libraries. I love Eileen. The other writers loved her too. I need to call the library and let them know how helpful she was. I hope the other writers do the same.

Two of my favorite books, one from childhood, one I'm reading now

2011-08-23T10:56:00.000-04:00

My all time favorite picture book as a child was and is Miss Twiggley's Tree by Dorothea Warren Fox.
In this story Miss Twiggley is a bit shy but very caring. The town people view her as being crazy because she is strange. She dresses funny, lives in a tree with animals and rarely associates with the people in town. She is strange but kind. Disaster strikes and the only safe place is the tree house. Miss Twiggley welcomes them all, even the people and animals that have been judgmental and mean.

I found this picture not too long ago. It is the ultimate dream tree house that I would love to have built. If I ever fulfill that dream I will probably also hide out from the world in my tree house just as Funny Miss Twiggley did. I mean, she was my idol after all and I do have THOSE days every now and then where I just need to hide away from the world. I love the idea of being a happy hermit. I guess I know too much about abuse to actually isolate myself for a long time. Abusers isolate, so if I isolate myself from the world it will actually be a form of self inflicted abuse and I don't really want that.

I went to the library yesterday and the book I decided to check out is called "a stolen life" a memoir by jaycee dugard. In case you don't watch the news or were not paying attention to her story she was an eleven year old girl who was abducted in 1991. She was thought by many to be dead because that was a long time to be missing. In her words on the jacket flap "On August 26, 2009, I took my name back. My name is Jaycee Lee Dugard. I don't think of myself as a victim. I survived."

I also love her two reasons for writing this book. I agree that so called crazy people should still be held responsible for their actions. Our society has gone soft by giving criminals all their rights but none of their responsibilities. I believe that it is every person's daily responsibility to treat others with dignity and respect, the golden rule "treat others the way you want to be treated" doesn't work when self loathing is involved.
There are a lot of people thinking terrible thoughts that lead to terrible actions....they need to start thinking better about themselves and others so the change we want to see in our society can happen.

Angry, self loathing, jealous, blaming, crazy people give the fun, loving, energetic, caring, positive thinking ones a bad name. I really think we should stop calling it mental illness without a cure and think of it as being out of balance. Being out of balance can be cured with a combination of therapies as long as the patient is willing to accept the treatment and wants what is healthy instead of what is unhealthy. If they incorporate healthy, positive coping skills into their life instead of unhealthy negative ones that only harm (like cigarettes, drugs, and alcohol) they will feel, look and perform better. I know those are a lot of conditions but I am forever hopeful. I am glad that Jaycee's mom remained hopeful and was rewarded by getting her daughter back. I love that there is now a foundation to facilitate awareness in schools about the important need to care for one another. The motto is "Just Ask Yourself to....Care!"

I hope that more and more people incorporate health and well being into their daily routine and make the choices that are best for themselves as well as the people who surround them. Captain Chaos and I often joke that everyone is crazy - it's just a matter of degree. That thought alone should be enough to remove the stigma associated with mental illness. Maybe then people could get the help they need instead of remaining victims of their own warped minds and inflicting pain and suffering on themselves and others.

My first public reading

2011-08-14T19:10:00.000-04:00

For my own, newly published, children's picture book that is. I've read books to kids plenty of times. I've done creative story telling and ad lib dinner theater too, so I'm comfortable with all of that. Ok so it's not like I hit the big time, but I'm very happy and grateful that I've hit the little time, because it was fun and I have a feeling there will be lots more fun times ahead.

I was the guest children's author at the Coventry Ct. Farmer's market today. It was kid's day! It rained so I was in the Nathan Hale homestead from 12 noon till 1pm. Not as large a crowd because of the rain and I chose inside where I was told I would have less exposure. I wanted the kids to be able to draw pictures. I couldn't see having more exposure but no place for them to be comfortable. The thought of parents and children standing to hear me read my book didn't sit well with me. I am grateful for the wonderful people I did meet. What a great place for families. If you have never been, you might want to click on the highlighted text to learn the whole who, what, where and when of it all.

Lucky chickens

2011-08-02T11:49:00.000-04:00

I know, I know the saying is supposed to be lucky ducks, but they were being noncompliant and I am not into forcing anything on anyone.

This one got right in my face. I just said "I hope you let someone read to you some day, you will probably enjoy it."

I received the author's copies of my book today! I am so happy, and thankful. The publisher did an awesome job. I didn't expect the cover to look kind of pink but I'm really happy that it is because I'm tickled pink!

I will share the link from Amazon soon. Oh, and just to let you know 4 out of 5 chickens recommend my book (the fifth one said he couldn't relate because Peter talks to pigs, and there were no birds of his kind in the entire thing). Oh well, you can't please EVERYONE!

A day to be curious but not act like a monkey....

2011-07-13T14:58:00.000-04:00

there will be other days for that, I assure you. I wouldn't miss out on such a thing.

But this day we were curious about all the things around us.

We found a white spider. I never saw before. We looked it up. We love you Google! We discovered it is was a golden rod spider. Normally I love spiders because they eat the bugs I don't like, the ones that bite me.

This monster eats the bugs we do like - the honey bees. We decided that since we had the opportunity and he was the enemy we killed him. Is that wrong? Should we have let nature take it's course? Oh well, too late.

Damien was very curious about Eric's bees. I was curious about how Eric can go right in among them without a suit. He's brave and kind. I think the bees know that some how.

Damien wanted to go fishing. He didn't care that the pole we have is pink. I agree that things like that are not important. We didn't catch any fish but we found this curious specimen on the path....

some kind of poop! Practically petrified poop to be exact but we forgot to look it up to see which animal it could be from. What do you think? Should I type in animal poop, images to see what Google gives me?

Images didn't help, but it was funny, go ahead and try for yourself, I know you want to. Then I used a trick Eric and I do a lot and typed in "HOW TO" so I typed how to identify animal scat (that's the more sophisticated word for animal poop). The top of my search had an IQ test quiz thingy, hmmm someone trying to say something here? Then I continued to read and from what I read the most I can determine at this point is that this scat is from a cat, that's enough about that.

We went on to being curious about what the garden is producing. Ahhhh, Green is my most favorite color!

Damien wanted to learn how to make pickles.....ha ha ha instant ~~slave~~ I mean student.

Doesn't he look proud?

He only burned himself three little times - there was a lesson in that too. I said "Pay attention, or you will get burned." That's a lesson I need to keep reminding myself, but I'm learning.

Ducks in a row

2011-07-07T08:54:00.000-04:00

They saw their opportunity to be fed and a running they did come.

It took a little while to get organized ......

but eventually I had all my ducks in a row - just by showing up and feeding them.

They knew they didn't have to stay in a row. They are grateful that I provide for them and they know I love them. Keeping them in a row would be more controlling then loving, totally uncalled for. I don't need to do that.

They are smart enough to use their freedom wisely and make choices that are best for themselves and benefit others as well. They live one day at a time knowing there is a time and place for everything.

We don't have freedom. We are stuck behind this wire. My mother didn't love me, it's society's fault, ummm ummm the devil made us do it.

Okkkkayyyy how's that attitude working out for you? Be careful how you think because your thoughts really do effect your actions. Those who think like victims usually take other victims or remain victims themselves.

I love Pie and having the perspective I choose

2011-06-13T06:53:00.000-04:00

It was my granddaughter's turn to sleep over this weekend. We decided to pick some more strawberries and make a pie.

I don't know about you, but I love pie! It always taste even better when someone else helps make it.

It's tastes even better if the person helping is enjoying themselves, and not feeling obligated to help. My granddaughter was enjoying every minute.

She is Four and loves to do it herself. We even came up with an extra idea to make our pie a little different.

We made it a bunny rabbit pie - not Hasenpfeffer! I would never knowingly eat my favorite animal, yuck! It was a fruit pie (strawberry rhubarb) with two little cookie cutter bunnies on top. We used a little of the now pink tapioca to make cute little noses for our bunnies.

My granddaughter cut out farm animal shapes with the left over pie dough and sprinkled her cookies with cinnamon sugar.

Aren't they cute?

She got a little tired of me taking pictures of her, and asked if she could use the camera.

She took a picture of my butt and laughed, it's becoming almost a tradition. Obviously I have no shame. I realize that most people would not post a picture of their butt on their blog and that many people get in trouble for posting body part pictures on the internet. Don't worry mine will always be clothed, well, at least till I have that senile defense thing going for me. I am an antagonist after all, so my plan is to become a nudist but not until my body is extremely old and wrinkly.

I guess this weekend was all about my butt for some reason. My sister came over and reminded me that our parents had a nickname for me "Carol Annie, big fat fannie." I almost forgot about that. My sister remarked that according to today's politically correct standards that wasn't very nice of our parents. I laughed and said "Do you remember what they said if we felt like our feelings were hurt and questioned their actions?" Yes folks, as a child I was allowed to do that and I raised my daughter to question authority as well. We just have to remember to do it politely, especially when our authority figures are being extra ridiculous.

"Oh yeah, she said, "they always said I wouldn't tease you if I didn't love you."

"See, I said, they weren't being cruel, they were just preparing us for the real world. People are not always going to be nice so it is important that you hold on to what you believe about yourself, question someone directly if they are doing something that makes you have a feeling you don't like. There is a big difference in teasing from someone you know loves you, and insults from someone who wants to bring you down because they don't feel good about themselves. Sometimes they will even admit this is what they are doing when you question them directly.

Kids at the safe home often teased to hurt. When a child who's feelings were hurt came to me to tell on someone who said they were fat or ugly I always said "Would you be upset if someone said you were a big hairy, purple monster?" The answer was always "no." Then why should you be upset when you know that we are all beautiful in our own way?

My granddaughter always has the craziest hair when she wakes up. I said " I love your hair."
She asked "why?"
"Because it's so wild and free." I replied.
Of course we often feel we have to tame ourselves before going out in public, and as my dad always said "if you don't want to see it posted about you in the newspaper the next day, don't do it." but being wild and free should always be allowed, as long as it's respectful and doesn't hurt anyone physically, how you feel is your choice.

Clouds!

2011-06-06T19:06:00.001-04:00

I don't know about you but I love clouds. They make me think of some of my favorite children's authors. Eric Carle wrote a story called "Little Cloud". If you click on his name it will take you to an awesome idea about making your own cotton ball clouds with the children you love. I remember doing this with the kids at the South Windsor Safe home. We hung our creations on the dining room ceiling and made our own creative sky. I wish I had a picture of that. I do have a picture of one of the rooms I painted. I think the clouds the kids made were better though. I have the picture in my mind.

Today I got a heart cloud when I looked into the sky! Ahhh, can't you just feel the love?

Oh no! Is that the rhino from my favorite Roald Dahl book "James and the Giant Peach" ?

Don't worry folks, there is nothing to fear.......

Check out the spaces in between - it's a smiley face! I hope you can see it too. What do you see in the clouds?

"A single photo – no words – capturing a simple, special, extraordinary moment. A moment I want to pause, savor and remember."

2011-06-03T06:26:00.000-04:00

Thanks to Ascending the Hills for this Friday Tradition.

Duckling weekend

2011-05-23T20:56:00.000-04:00

Thanks to Andrea Bortolan, teacher extraordinaire, who hatches ducklings for her first grade class at Vernon Center Road School in Connecticut we had new arrivals at our little farm.

My grandchildren were so excited to meet the ducklings as well as Andrea's son.

We did some rearranging in the chicken coop to make room for the ducklings. Thanks goes to my husband. We weren't able to make their outside fenced area and escape hatch yet because of all the rain. I know ducks like rain and all, but seriously, it's preventing us from making them a proper, safe, home where they can enjoy playing outside when they want to. Don't worry I won't let them stay cooped up too long, that would be cruel.

We took them outside to play.

We loved them and hugged them up a bit.

We even introduced them to some new friends. We had to make sure they stayed safe so we payed attention to how they interacted. The new friends didn't mean anything by it, but because they were so different there was some misunderstandings (someone thought someone else looked a little like lunch or something) and although these dogs are very well trained, their mom still has to give them time outs here and there. She knows that limits = love and discipline is not a bad thing at all. It's also important that everyone stays safe while they all have a good time, so we can have many more good times.

As a parent you should never play favorites but I can't help myself. Want to see my favorite duckling?

Ha ha, it's my granddaughter. To avoid playing favorites I let my grandchildren take turns having sleep overs. This weekend was Aries turn. I have to admit - she is my favorite granddaughter. I can say that because I only have two other grandsons. They are my favorite eight year old and favorite two year old (years subject to change, but not my preferences). I hope everyone had as ducky a weekend as I did.

This Moment

2011-05-20T17:14:00.000-04:00

"A single photo – no words – capturing a simple, special, extraordinary moment. A moment I want to pause, savor and remember."

Thanks to Ascending the Hills Blog for this tradition.

Funny edible clay

2011-05-18T06:49:00.000-04:00

My grandson and I made edible clay this past weekend.

It's a great recipe if you aren't allergic to peanuts.

1 cup of corn syrup
1 cup of peanut butter
1 1/4 cups of dry milk
1 1/4 cups of powdered sugar

We started out with innocent happy creations.

I was practicing making replicas of our friends Bob and Barbara ( shhhh, I am making them an edible cake topper for their re-dedication ceremony)

It sort of looks like him.

Damien and I said what should we make next?

Damien decided to make sea urchins using my tea strainer spoon.

I decided to make a zombie.... I thought it would be fun to eat one instead of worrying about zombies coming to eat my brains....for some funny reason I seldom really worry about that happening.

Damien took this picture of me getting all crazy hungry for zombies. We got real silly after that and things went down hill fast....

oops - we can't ALWAYS shine. Sometimes we need to poop, no? Wouldn't this make a great April fools joke? I doubt you will see it in Martha Stewart magazine though. Maybe I went a little too far. Not far enough you say....... ok, how about this?

We decided to make all the poops we could think of....this is goat poop.

cow pie!

Saying grace for horse turds. If you are already offended you better stop it gets slightly worse .....

Slimey chicken sludge, you get the look by wetting the edible clay in your mouth first.

And last but not least by any means......Damien's idea and creation..........

The human who recently ate corn poop.

We were laughing so hard I got a lot of blurry, unusable pictures. My daughter said "If a note comes home from school wanting to know why Damien is saying his grandmother is feeding him poop, you're explaining it."

No problem! I can do that, but can the schools explain the poop they tell our children half the time?

Hey kids be careful what you think or feel

2011-05-14T06:31:00.000-04:00

It's amazing how your day goes depending on what mood you are in. I was in a silly mood when I went to Brimfield Antique show with Captain Chaos (that's my husband's nickname and you'll see why in this little story).

The first thing we saw was this sign.

Don't tell me I can't stand somewhere! I know what a rebel, huh? I didn't want to spend my whole day standing there just to make a point but I really was not afraid of anyone enforcing this silly rule. Just to prove that point I had the good captain take a picture - evidence of my defiance against rules that are silly.

Rules that protect people from getting hurt are a different story. I kinda like those rules.

Sometimes I need a hand in knowing what is in my best interest.

Sometimes, I REALLY need a lot of hands. This is why I am so grateful for my friends and family who can state their opinions and facts with feeling until I actually decide to listen to them.

We saw chickens - they were not for sale, but I love chickens. These ladies had a fun looking home, even though it looked like a cage. I don't ever want to be a caged bird.

We saw a Norman Bates mom, or maybe this is Norman - it's so hard to tell really.

Captain Chaos pointed out this sign, hmmm was he trying to tell me something?! Could that have been a sign? We actually have a theory that we are all insane - it's just a matter of degree. It's another one of those choices to make in life, all those choices add up to who we are. I like being weird, it beats being boring.

Awww look what happened once the tin man got a heart. He found a romantic partner. Of course she will probably rip his heart out....wait that's not fair....I don't know that....that's just the cynic in me talking. Don't listen to that part of me. There are just as many examples of great relationships to learn from as there are not so great ones.

I had to take a picture of this doggie sleeping so peacefully. We had an English border collie when I was a kid. My parents let us name it. They said, "Now keep in mind, it's a boy." So we named our dog "BOY DOG" and our parents let it stay that way, good times.

I love to think that things are constantly improving that is what I choose to notice in life. Isn't it great that people have become so much more respectful that we no longer need signs like this posted in our neighborhoods? Of course the good captain and I were wondering how things will play out if our state and country decides to legalize marijuana. Do people have enough respect for others who don't want that kind of high? We know we can get high just by thinking awesome thoughts and noticing the beauty that surrounds us without having to injure our lungs or our minds. How will those who need to smoke something to get this same feeling keep their smoke to themselves without giving small children a contact high? Oh well, I guess there is a lot to work out on that one. How do they do it in Switzerland, Holland, or Portugal? I do agree that decriminalizing drugs and regulating the sale with lots of education about how they are negative coping skills for those who don't know a better way is a start to helping those who abuse them or even help those who waste lots of money on them to make our world an even better/safer place for small children. I've probably seen more than most people regarding the damage these dependencies inflict on children so forgive me if I'm getting preachy but I know how easy it would be to keep our children more safe but I don't understand why everyone doesn't care.

I decided to behave myself when it came time to eat. There were lots of other, less healthy choices, but I enjoyed spinach pie and Greek salad (I LOVE OLIVES - that's almost a palindrome) with cucumber yogurt dressing. It was yummy!

Here is the part where you will understand why I call him captain chaos. I was behaving and then he brings this apple pie ice cream concoction with two spoons.
"A full barn and a fat wife can do no man no harm." he says

I love him!

This is c3po's wife, I think. Doesn't she shine?

Sharing my excitement

2011-05-09T17:09:00.000-04:00

The cover of my picture book "Picky Eater that Peter" is being designed from one of my illustrations. Should I keep it a secret until it comes out this summer?

Now that would be silly. I want everyone to be able to recognize it so you can get your very own copy. I may have shared this before, so forgive me if I did. I'm just so excited.

I love days like today. I am so thankful for the support and help from my loving family who help me make all my dreams come true. What dreams are you making come true for yourself?

Happy Cinco de Mayo

2011-05-05T10:12:00.000-04:00

Cinco de Mayo - a holiday for the little guy or don't be a chicken.

I am all for freedom and I love stories like David defeating Goliath, little guy winning against those more powerful - in the material sense of things. The more you study history (especially the wars) you see a pattern of diabolical people with selfish interests trying to rule the world, a small group of people (that seems large because they are the "I think I cans" vs all the "I think I can'ts") who are controlling a large mass of followers or people who live in fear. hmmmm anyone else notice this pattern? Did you notice why the little guys occasionally manage to win? It's always something ABOVE the material that helps them over come their fear and start thinking that they can. I would like to encourage all children who feel powerless because maybe someone who seems bigger, seems more powerful, or seems to have more physical strength is oppressing you, limiting you, and trying to keep you down with cruel words and deeds to consider that there are things more powerful than what we see in our physical world. There is a power that you can be a part of, if you believe in yourself, you will no longer allow others to hurt you. You will know that when someone shouts at you, calls you names, hurts you or is disrespectful in any way, it is more of a reflection of their own fears than anything you are doing or being. Everyone gets to choose who they are and how they want to treat others and be treated by others. Be yourself, look for all the things you excel at, not to out perform or compete with someone else, but so that you can contribute to society as a whole. When you think about what you can give, instead of what you can take, the world becomes a brighter place. Takers tend to feel empty always looking for more to take while givers tend to feel full always looking for more they can give. I know it's not that black and white, it's really more grey. We are all takers and givers to some degree depending on the moment. Maybe if we all learned how to give willingly and take what is offered graciously we would achieve the balance we all crave. Isn't it great that we have free will and can choose to stick up for ourselves when we see abuse of power for self interest and can question authority instead of living in fear? Please remember the power of alcohol can overcome your power to think so be careful in the amounts you consume if it's part of your celebration today. One more thing I will never celebrate war, fights, or destruction but I do love the idea of freedom, community, and balance. I believe that one day we will find a way to stick up for ourselves as a nation without having to destroy anyone in the process. I hope we are not destroying others for selfish reasons. I am both proud and ashamed to be an American at times, but I live with the belief that things are constantly improving.

A poem to my brother Robert, who was born too sensitive

2011-05-04T06:25:00.000-04:00

Baby Bear what do you choose

It’s your life, nothing to lose

I hope you chose love

and help rise above

all the corruption and hate

that we’ve been hearing of late.

Please don’t let it effect you

You can decide what to do

Forgive and give thanks

these words are not pranks

when you let others control you

good feelings are few

Be yourself, but chose best

and get plenty of rest

Don’t let the past be more than a guide

Shine bright and don’t hide

Wish you could stay awake

but if you hibernate

chose the dreams that will serve you

and remember it’s all true

Life is what you make

live it, but don’t fake

Balance is the key,

I hope you hear me.

I love my brother, Robert, who we often called Pooh Bear. I hope he chooses what's best for himself. I have nothing but faith, because even when I want what is best I know I can't control others, only myself.

When did we grow up or did we?

2011-04-30T05:30:00.000-04:00

There are days when I feel very childlike. I try to avoid feeling childish but I have my moments doing that too. Hopefully those moments are not so long that they become annoying to anyone.
I admit and am proud to say that I am a past positive person. I know that the past was not ALL great but I like to dwell on the good parts. I go down memory lane a lot. I know it is popular to be in the moment but that is hard to do if you are a writer. I jump from past to present to future often in my thoughts. Yesterday, I took the almost one hour drive back to my home town because my best friend since first grade was in Ct. She lives in Florida now.

I was remembering back to when I was a teenager and worked at a store called Food N Stuff. My other best friend, since sixth grade, worked with me. There was a prerequisite for working there - you had to be beautiful. I remember telling the owner once that beauty is in the eye of the beholder. It all made sense to me at that moment why my interview only consisted of showing up, there weren't a lot of hard questions to answer. har har har Some of us beauties were rebels as well. He might have seen that coming if he had asked more questions. Rebel without a clue - that was me all right. Oh well. The girls who worked there could tell you some stories.We met many interesting people, had a lot of good times, lessons were learned, and memories made.

That store is now called Bosco's. Bosco went to school with me too. His real name is.....wait I don't live in town anymore....I'm not sure if I'm supposed to let anyone know this.....maybe there are contests and prizes, sort of like a Rumplestiltzchen sort of thing. I better not let you know. I think I also remember why he is called Bosco. That would make a great trivia question too. I think I will save it for our reunion - it's coming up this fall.

There is more than one welcome sign at Bosco's. I like that because that is one big thing I like about Stafford, Ct. I always felt welcome, like I could belong to any club I wanted to. It was my choice, not that I always made the BEST choices growing up but that is what growing up is all about, NO?

Bosco wasn't there. I'll probably tease him about that next time I see him. There was a beautiful young woman from Texas working there. That reminds me of my other best friend since fifth grade because she now lives in Texas and she is beautiful too.

The four of us were a little group or clique all through high school but we are not really all that alike. We have to accept each other for our similarities and our differences.

Food N Stuff, which is now Bosco's is a lot better now. No offense to the past, but shouldn't that be how things go? Shouldn't they get better as we learn, and grow? I noticed that the pretty woman was not working alone, there were lots of choices, everything was clean and modern, and the grinder was huge (that's what we call a hoagie in Ct.) I remember friends in NY thinking that sounded disgusting but I never thought of it that way.

This is a hoagie.

This is a more like a grinder from Bosco's . If you think that's disgusting it's not my fault.

Linda and I had a bit of catching up to do. I thought that we had a falling out and that is why I hadn't heard from her. No falling out on her part. She just doesn't use the computer like I do. She may never even see this, and that's ok. I'm not looking for her approval. She's not looking for mine. We talked and disagreed about a few things. We will still be friends. I didn't volunteer to do anything. She didn't ask me to do anything. We are not as close as we used to be, probably because we do have such different views on life. I don't think either one of us is right or wrong. We are just making different choices. Our lives reflect the choices that we make.

This was our "pretend we are gossiping" photo.

I remember the day I decided Linda was going to be my friend. It was the same day I decided that I was no longer going to care about competing. I'm not a very competitive person even though I've competed in and for things, but when I was in first grade being first meant EVERYTHING to me. I used to try to be the first person in line to go into school. Some days I would be first and other days another girl would beat me to it.
One day I was already in second place and that is when I noticed Linda. She was playing on the playground, running, laughing, having a great time. I remember realizing that it was stupid to compete for first place and get stuck not having fun. I decided to go meet that fun girl and stop competing or trying to be first. I could never be first anyways - I already had a sister, so she beat me to it. I am happy to say that although my sister and I are different she is also like a best friend too. I am very lucky to have so many best friends that are all very different and can take turns spending time with different old me! Everything is always changing but some things stay the same. Did you ever stop to think how much of that is controlled by choice?

We are all beautiful but I really gotta do something about my hair. Linda looks great though, and I'm happy for her.

Woo hoo there was no SCHOOL

2011-04-25T06:56:00.000-04:00

Don't get me wrong here. I am all for education. I also know that we learn constantly and sometimes school can just feel like a big waste of time (depending on how it is run). There is good and bad to be found in every situation so I'm not going to dwell on that particular debate. What I do want to share is all the fun I had with my grandchildren last week.

We visited the library for a movie and popcorn event. The movie was "Tangled" by Disney. It was the first time we saw it, and we enjoyed it very much.

We had sleepovers and baked cupcakes that looked like ice cream cones.

We had places to go and people to see. Rain or shine we were having FUN!

We talked with Mr.Loser Rooster. He and his brother were separated for fighting.

Bay got a lot of attention, even though she can be a bit intimidating because of her size.

Aries decided to ride only the fake horse for now.

Another day at the library - this time for "Diary of a Wimpy kid" party.

There was trivia and drawing but then it got disappointing, because only 2 out of eight children read the books. They decided to watch another movie for the day. Yes, I was cringing and biting my tongue. Things will improve in our little town. I saw a lot of ways for this to happen by participating in what they have to offer, and seeing how it is now. I'm not afraid to get involved but I don't want to alienate the people I would love to motivate.

Another sunset, time is our friend, things are constantly improving with each new day.

We colored those eggs.

Everyone had directions and were allowed choices to do it their way, to some degree.

Odyn says "I'm not in school so I'm always on vacation, and I'm always learning, please be careful what you teach me."

Easter egg hunt the next day in spite of the rain.

Just as fun indoors no sense in crumbling or complaining (wasting time) that we couldn't have it outside as preferred.

My niece, Jamie Lee, found the golden egg and Damien reacted dramatically - all in good fun. I am Fefe to them, that is what they call me instead of grandma. I will always try my best to supply the golden eggs. Keep learning, beautiful children. I know that because of you our world will keep improving.

Saturday.... at the Library

2011-04-11T06:58:00.000-04:00

I know the song goes Saturday.... in the park....but for me and my grandson it's the library on that day.

When we lived in Springfield Ma. I brought my grandson, Damien to the library on a weekly basis.
He was only about two years old when he would walk into the building, inhale deeply, and declare, "Ahhhh, I love that smell."

This my folks, is why there is no need to fear the e-book. Computers are not here to REPLACE the books and magazines we love, they just give more choices. There is more to love, not less.

Damien called me Friday night to tell me he lost that pesky front tooth that's been loose, like FOREVER. He said, "We need to go to the library and show everyone that I'm still the same person, I just look different."

This is the part of the library where the romance books are kept. Isn't it romantic?

Our library in Lebanon Ct. is very cool - most libraries are.
Right now they are having "Equinox and the Arts" their 16th annual artists exhibition to showcase the talent of local artists. There are sixty three pieces of art this year, a lot of talented people in our area.

Another cool thing about our library is that there is a nice mix of old and new. I like the fact that libraries have computers, and movies, as well as books, newspapers, and magazines. I love having choices.

Damien got a little fearful, or freaked out, as he likes to say, about Bobbie Brown's head of Teddy Roosevelt display. I explained it wasn't a real human head even though it looked so life like. We talked about what it was made of, who Teddy Roosevelt was, and what he had to do with the Teddy Bear that Steif is so famous for.

So many talented people - Jack B.Allen's "The Patriarch" almost seems to come to life, but was nothing to fear.

Shameless PLUG WARNING: Damien poses next to my drawing that he was the model for. One of the illustrations for my book "Picky Eater, that Peter" that will be coming out this year.

After the library I treated Damien to the food I fear the most - McDonald's. Damien reminded me that I could have one of their salads if I wanted. Smart kid. Smart McDonald's, changing with the times and giving choices. No need for fear. I could also choose to just have a drink if I didn't want the preservatives that are on the salad.

Maybe I'm wrong, but I'm thinking fast food is an ok once in awhile thing.

I told Damien I had a little surprise for him. He thought that meant something good until I said "a haircut". He groaned a little, but complied when I told him GameStop is in the same strip mall as the Barber.

Everyone fears that I will spoil the children. I have been accused of this since I became a parent. I don't think anyone cared about me spoiling the kids when I was younger and babysat. I was very much in demand as a babysitter who actually enjoyed being with children and giving them choices.

Yes, I bought my grandson a game, and his favorite meal, but I don't think I spoiled him.

He agreed to help me with some chores and he did. We are both grateful.

So here is that boy, with the new smile, haircut, and game, who adds so much joy to our lives.

When Franklin D. Roosevelt said "There is nothing to fear, but fear itself." he lied.

There are a couple of things to fear - like REAL lions if they are hungry and you are trying to keep them as pets, but you run out of food and think that they love you because of your sparkling personality instead of the fact that you are the person who feeds them. I mean seriously, you have to have some common sense.

I think not having choices would be a scary thing but I don't fear change.

I may have lied to Damien about what I thought was the reason Theodore Roosevelt was responsible for the name Teddy Bear - my memory didn't serve me correctly. I looked it up. I'm thankful for libraries and computers. I can read, learn, and make choices. I'll apologize and tell my grandson what I've learned since then. You may find yourself doing that a lot as a parent or grandparent, if you are continuing to learn. I don't claim to know it all, but I'm glad I can find information I want so quickly.

You might also fear missing out on this great exhibit because it is at the Jonathan Trumbull library in Lebanon, Ct. for a limited time only. Don't worry you have till April 16th to be exact - it's a Saturday!

Rejection

2011-04-03T14:14:00.035-04:00

I got a rejection letter the other day for a children's story called "Prayers Answered." I forgot I even wrote it.

I was afraid to look back and see what it was, but I did look, because I'm brave like that.

The publisher was real nice about it.
They said, "we regret to say that this submission is not right for our book program. Of course, what does not suit our particular needs may suit perfectly well the needs of another publisher. We wish you well in your efforts elswhere."

This is what I said to myself;
"Self, it's no wonder they rejected that piece of garbage. Oh I'm so embarrassed, I don't know if I even double spaced properly, and it was a rhyming story that lacked rhythm." I think I told them where the pictures should go, Oops."

Well, I know better now. Can I send them an apology letter? Probably not, huh?

I have CBI (Children's book insider clubhouse), the scbwi and the 2011 Children's Writer's & Illustrator's Market 23rd annual edition, to thank for the knowledge and helpful hints I've acquired since I began this journey. I am also writing with purpose, every day now, that helps too.

I think writing can be a good reflection of who a person is, just like their pets and how they decorate give clues. (My daughter was just featured on Etsy for her decorating skills. You can check it out if you click on Daughter). That makes sense. I obviously like to brag about my daughter. I'm ok with that.

As a human being I'm improving. I'm still a control freak, but less so now. I am learning to have more compassion and be less judgmental (all part of the plan I had for this journey).

I have Bob Proctor and Lanny Morton's six minutes to success, Jack Canfield's How to Build High Self-Esteem, Gerry Robert's mentoring advice and a slew of self improvement books including Rhonda Byrne's The Secret and The Power, and the Bible, that have aided me in improving my way of thinking this past year, as well as many dear face book friends with their wonderful facts and opinions. I cherish them all.

I'm not trying to sell anything to anyone - just telling you what I've been studying. I often joke that other people pay to go to a gym but I don't need to because I get enough physical activity on our farm, but sometimes paying for something makes you actually use it.

Of course, I might be more physically fit if I had an instructor shouting at me like they do in those lose weight shows on TV. Then again, I might be in jail for slugging the instructor. I don't like people yelling in my face, who knows?! I don't regret for a minute any money I've paid for the education I've received. It's good to know what part you play in your failure to succeed, so you can change if it is success you are after.

My problem for the longest time was changing my mind. Creative ideas come easily to me, sometimes people compliment me on something I've done and I think "that's nothing compared to what I wanted to do." I know now that I have to stick with an idea and keep trying different ways to make it work.

I'm not going to throw my story away. I'm going to see if I can improve it and then find another publisher.

I can't send it out again "as is" because that would be cruel. Any Bare Naked Ladies fans in the house? Click on Bare to hear what song I'm thinking of, as I bare my soul to yous peoples.

I don't want a publisher with low standards. I want a reflection of who I am. I have high standards - maybe that is why I seem so mean to myself.

I'm not really. I love myself. I want what is best for me. I want better, better, BEST and that only comes with practice, trial and error and stick-to-it-ive-ness (and I thought that was going to be easier than spelling perseverance). See what I mean?

I apologize to anyone who clicked on Bare expecting to just hear the song and not have to read - guess I don't have that control freak thing licked after all. I like to make people READ.

I'm learning to be more compassionate though so I want people to Want to read what I write instead of me tricking them into it.

I know there is an audience for my writing. I just have to keep the faith, keep writing, keep submitting.
It's what I love (the writing anyways) the submitting, not so much.
It's not really work, shhhh don't tell anyone, but I play all day.

Overcoming Challenges

2011-03-21T06:37:00.001-04:00

Challenges we all have them, whether we choose to admit it or not. I've overcome a few in my day. They go away but then new ones come,so I think it's better to think of them as challenges rather than difficulties because as challenges, at least to me, they sound more able to be solved.

I am still basking in the glow of attending my first SCBWI-NE event , a program called Overcoming Challenges presented at The Eric Carle Museum of Picture Book Art on Saturday.
I loved it even more than I thought I would.
When I pulled up to the museum I was greeted by this awesome little bug.

Definitely not the Crouchy Lady Bug (a personal favorite of mine) but this car made me smile just as much as that book. I knew it was going to be a good day.

I arrived at 10:00 am for registration and networking. I said hello to a few people and sat in the front row. I like saying that with enthusiasm FRONT ROW!

I got an extra special surprise during networking hour (well, it was really only half an hour but I'm not good with time, it's one of my challenges). A lovely young woman named Sera Rivers sat near me, leaving one seat in between us. Then another beautiful woman came to say hello to her, and left as quick as she came.

Hey, I know that beautiful person I said to myself. I wasn't worried that I wouldn't see her again, because being as curious as I am, I overheard that she was coming back and would be sitting next to me.

Wow, this is fantastic. This is someone I was looking for recently and did not meet the challenge of finding. A long lost school pal that I was trying to find because our 30th high school reunion is in September. Without further ado......I would like to introduce a former partner in childhood adventures........

Ta da...... Penny.

We shared silly memories of camping overnights, and frightening ourselves with our own stories and imaginations. We often did that on purpose when we were younger. We loved the thrill of it. When you get older you realize there are enough frightening things in the world but it's still fun to make up stories as an escape. Penny and I have a lot of stories in us, to share with the world. I was surprised that she is not publishing poetry because that is how I think of Penny. Whatever she decides to get published, I know and think of her as a poet. I am so happy and grateful that we found each other again and hope we stay in touch.

Then I had to be quiet because it was 10:30am and the authors who were there to speak were coming on. Anyone who knows me, knows what a HUGE challenge that must have been. I managed.

The panelists included Brian Lies ( I know what a great name huh? for a story teller! actually it is pronounced Lees). Seriously, what a great name it's like you have no choice but to go into writing or politics. He is a picture book author illustrator who started his career drawing political cartoons. I think that is awesome. He is so funny. He had me laughing out loud. His latest books are about bats. I LOVE bats. I caught and released a bat last year. CLICK HERE is you missed that and are curious. I should warn you that it is a facebook photo story - not video. I am mean like that and try to make others READ.

Lucky for me I don't have to be mean to my grandchildren - they love to read. This book is going to be Odyn's Easter present. He just turned two. My daughter was telling me how he wakes up covered in books each morning as he flips them off the shelf into his crib so he can enjoy all the pictures. Soon he will be in a big boy bed really reading himself to sleep. It goes by too quick.

The next author to speak was Mary Newell DePalma another picture book author/illustrator. I love her hair but I didn't let that distract me from what she was saying. I bought her picture book "A Perfect Gift" as a perfect gift for my granddaughter, Aries. I know Aries it going to love it. Mary writes and draws the kind of stories a four year old could enjoy over and over. I know because sometimes I feel like a four year old ( I like to play all day) and I read this story many times already. I'm saving this gift book as an Easter gift. Some of my granddaughter's favorite things are books, candy, and fashion. I bet she would love Mary's hair too.

This book is so perfect because the main character is on her way to grandma's house to give her a gift. I think of my grandchildren as perfect gifts. It's funny how things just go in circles like that over and over. I love it.

The next author made me cry - not in a bad way. Her name is Jo Knowles and she is very passionate. She writes chapter books for teens. She is compassionate and sweet. Wow, I think I learned more from her in a short period of time than I even intended. Her book "Jumping off Swings" is one I am reading for myself. She is a writer that is going to make a mark in this world. Duh, she already has, what I mean to say is that her subject matter needs to be heard and she has such an eloquent way of presenting. It can be heard through her voice in such a nonjudgmental way. Ahhhh, our world is constantly improving. I can feel it. Sweet and brave, what a nice combination.

Jo's book "Jumping off Swings" is about teen pregnancy and is told from four different perspectives. I love that it is presented this way. I believe this is a better way to think about these issues, sure beats a preachy little commercial that seems insulting to the child that was born. That is just my judgmental little opinion and maybe after I finish Jo's book I can even forgive the Palin's for not thinking before acting. I'm talking about the money making commercials, not the pregnancy. I still feel so sorry for that baby because it would probably receive more love it were money instead of a human. Oops, there I go again. Be more compassionate I tell myself, even for those who seem to lack compassion. One of these days I will listen to myself. I hope.

The last, but definitely not the least author to speak was Barbara O'Connor. Can I say I LOVE LOVE LOVE her? Her book "How to Steal a Dog" is just what the doctor ordered.

My oldest grandson, Damien, just got a dog for his birthday but he didn't get to have guests at his party because he didn't keep his end of the bargain. My daughter is one of those mean people too. We say what we mean and we mean what we say so when we spell things out to you and you don't do what is expected you should know what is coming next - it's just what we told you would happen. Don't worry we aren't THAT mean - everyone lives and we just try to improve things all the time. Damien's behaviors are improving. I think it is important for all children and adults to realize that they should be grateful for what they have and that things can improve if you keep trying. Barbara O'Connor does an excellent job illustrating this lesson in "How to Steal a Dog". What a voice! I read the book last night (one of the perks in waiting till Easter to give them as gifts) and I was moved. I cried. Anyone who knows me, knows that I've seen a lot and I am mad strong, but I still cry when something hits a certain nerve. I recommend this book to anyone, who like myself has said, at times, that they like animals more than people. This book will give you hope for the people too.

If you are curious about Damien and his dog you can click on his name in this sentence and read my daughter's blog.

What a great time. The authors were all so wonderful. They even agreed to pose with me for this picture.

God, if you are listening can you give me hair like Mary Newell DePalma. Oh, and a Big Thank YOU to Penny for taking this picture. I know my hair is not your fault, you were just taking the picture.

One last silly little thing - when I was leaving I noticed the bumper sticker on the car parked next to mine.

I thought perfect advice when you have a challenge to overcome. Think the good thoughts people, things are improving.

Inspiration of children

2011-03-13T09:04:00.000-04:00

Children are hilarious! I love being around them. Yesterday we celebrated my youngest grandchild's second birthday with a small family party. My daughter had a cold almost all week so I offered to help. I don't know how she does all that she does to begin with - maybe it's because she does it with love. This thought inspired me to change a children's story that I am working on to submit to Pockets interdenominational Christian magazine. I'm not ready to share that, but I will share all the fun we had at the birthday party.

Odyn turned two and I made the cupcakes. His sister, Aries helped decorate them. I found myself telling everyone "I made the cupcakes" (see I'm doing it again), and realized how needy I am for praise. They were delicious by the way. I apologized to my daughter after the party and she just laughed. I think she is used to me by now.

Odyn is only two so he doesn't have a wide circle of friends yet, but he is so adorable and full of personality we don't worry about the friend factor with him.

He did get to share his birthday with the wonderful Jamie Lee. It hurts my brain to figure this out - she is my daughter's cousin, so that makes her my grandchildren's second cousin?! Not like the olden days - my parents are each from large families and I have over one hundred cousins. I try to make up for my grandchildren's lack of cousins by acting as child like (not childish, there's a difference) as I can get away with.

Jamie Lee is like royalty to us!

Instead of kissing her ring I decided to take a picture of her toes. Times are changing and I felt this was more fitting. Aren't her toes gorgeous?

We encourage the love of the arts in our family. The guitar Odyn's parent's gave him was by far the BEST PRESENT EVER!!!!! Everybody thought so.........

Aries made me think of a miniature Janis Joplin - maybe it was the wild hair!

Mom, called her out on taking Odyn's present upstairs with her. Dad said his little girl wouldn't take something that didn't belong to her. Mom pays a little more attention to the guidance each child needs and related the story of what was likely to happen. (Based on the discovery of Damien's "Diary of a Whimpy Kid" books that were missing and later found in Aries toy box. By Aries, of course, who was looking for thanks and praise for "finding" them. hee hee I remember being a kid who needed the guidance of my parents.)

Rob (the DAD) Damien (Big Brother) and Odyn (Birthday Boy)

To me, although it is a little blurry, this is the BEST PICTURE EVER! This is the reaction of my daughter's boys as she illustrates with words what may likely be happening upstairs - Aries rocking out on the guitar, then secretly sliding it under her bed for later use, and how innocent she will act when asked if she knows where the guitar is.

There is a lot of love in this family, even if at times we all need a little guidance!

My secret room

2011-03-01T07:25:00.000-05:00

Eric surprised me last weekend by making a secret room (well, I guess it's not so secret now is it?)

I know a lot of people would not be able to create or even feel comfortable in a room this unfinished.

To me this is just perfect, after all I'm not finished yet either.

Things are constantly changing, I like to call that improvement. This room won't stay this unfinished, and hopefully the room and I will continue to improve on a daily basis. I know I am making an effort to do so.

I put some of my favorite pieces of amber glass in the window.

It's nice to have pretty things to look at.

One of my Dad's paintings and some of his old art supplies serve as inspiration for me. I don't paint on canvas like he did but the smell of turpentine reminds me of him creating in his art room. A little, not so secret room off of our living room. He didn't even mind us playing in there. He kept the paints up high.

I have books and supplies to keep me busy. Everyone can draw. It is just a matter of learning how to look at things differently and making an effort by practicing. You also need the desire. I still need to improve. I'm not as good as I want to be yet. I love learning so it is not a chore.

The only difficult thing is finding the time because there are so many things I enjoy doing.

I give myself new deadlines and projects everyday. I know that my stories and illustrations will improve as I continue to practice.

In Honor of Valentine's day and my parents

2011-02-14T06:34:00.000-05:00

This is my award winning published story.

How My Parents Met

My parents were the kind you could catch kissing in the kitchen. We kids would exaggerate our disgust of their public displays of affection. I can't speak for my sister or my two brothers but I know for myself that the way they were always gave me a sense of security. I especially enjoyed hearing them tell the story of how they met. I hope I can recreate that story for you now:

Jim, a handsome but painfully shy teenager, admired Marguerite, a natural beauty, from afar one night at the local roller rink. As he was staring at his object of affection his good buddy, Mac, broke his trance by asking him what he was doing.

"Who is she?" Jim asked.

"Oh her?" Think she's cute?" Mac replied with questions of his own.

"Uh huh." replied Jim with his mouth still hanging open.

"Want to meet her?" asked Mac.

"Uh huh." Replied Jim.

Before he realized what was happening, Jim was rolling uncontrollably toward the girl he had been staring at, aided by the push from Mac. Bodies collided, balance was lost, and Jim & Peggy fell "head over heels".

"Faggadoots, meet Jim." "Jim, meet my sister, Faggadoots" and with that Mac rolled away laughing never giving it a second thought.

Needless to say my mother thought my father was a clumsy oaf, at first, but somehow he managed to win her heart and I, for one, am forever grateful.

See what I mean about the kissing?

Creative process

2011-02-03T09:31:00.000-05:00

There are some days when I love everything I create. I think it is wonderful, even if it aint.
Tuesday was not one of those days. I kept feeling like I was making my illustrations for Picky Eater that Peter worse, instead of better.

I liked the way the drawings looked when they were drawings, but not after I added the color. I tried different techniques and some things I liked, others I didn't, but I kept trying.

Yesterday I had a difficult time even trying. I made excuses and found other things to do when I knew I should get going on this. It needs to be my first priority if I want this book to be available soon. I just couldn't make myself start.

I decided to look up one of my favorite children's writers (among the ones who are still alive). I don't know where this idea came from but I am thankful for it. I watched Patricia Polacco give an interview on a site called Reading Rockets and I was mesmerized. I love this woman. I love her stories. I never meant to have an idol because it's not really my style, but I have to admit that I admire this woman greatly.

She mentioned how she illustrates her books and then she gave me an idea. Eureka (I'm trying to bring this word back since OMG is overused.) it was the answer I was looking for.

She may never know how much she helped me. I did send her a thank you card once, handwritten because she doesn't use a computer. Ahhhh, that explains why this woman can get so much done.

I better go - I have a lot of pictures to create now that I know how I want to do them.

Live A Life Of Wonder... I Had A Dream

2011-02-02T09:40:00.000-05:00

Making Progress

2011-01-27T14:17:00.000-05:00

Busy, busy, busy....but happy, happy, happy. I am working on my children's book "Picky Eater, that Peter". I just need to finish coloring my illustrations then it's time to make more decisions with the publisher. I promise to let you know the how, what, when and where it will be available.

Go ahead and Back up

2011-01-02T07:30:00.001-05:00

One of my favorite little sayings is go ahead and back up. I have mentioned before that I am a past positive person. Many have commented that I am STRONG. I have endured many trials and tribulations, maybe I am just thick headed. What ever the case, not implying that I am a head case - I always move forward in a very brave way. Looking back at 2010 I see many little trials and lots of accomplishments. As always there are many things to be thankful for.

The baby ducks and chickens given to us by the teachers at the Vernon Center School after they hatch them in class. I hope 2011 brings more.

Fun in the garden (children of the corn, get it?)......

and there is always the FAIR.

I received, Bay, the gift horse and started the ice house conversion.

Not all I want it to be yet, but it's a start.

We moved the laundry from the basement, an attempt to get me to like this chore?! It's more tolerable now.

Thankful for Face book which made planning our high school reunion more easy. That is something very fun to look forward to (Sept. of 2011).

Making hay was even fun this year.

Thanks to the help received with good cheer.

Thankful to see and hear so much of the Jessica Prouty Band....

and have them stay over when their summer gigs were near.

My youngest grandson's first birthday.

Easter, holiday fun.

Made some pickles and jam, some were better than others.

Lots of fun being landlords in 2010. Lots of changes, out with the old, in with the new, in more ways than one.

Somewhere in between all the activities and fun I managed to write stories, and found a publisher for one.

Go ahead 2011, Bring it! I am more ready than ever. My big lesson for 2010? I realize as much as I enjoy helping others, I can only provide an opportunity, and lead by example. I don't have to feel guilty for being ME!

Life is what you make it!

Take my advice, I'm not using it.

2010-12-29T09:09:00.000-05:00

The snow caused a bit of a problem with people getting to the group home and guess who was on call? Calling down a short list of available people asking each one to fill in was not my idea of fun. I put on my happy voice and although I hate, hate, hate to beg, I probably did. It didn't work. Things don't always work out the way I want them to. NO MATTER, I really believe that everything happens for a reason. I packed my bag with books and projects because third shift is when the boys are asleep, and there is only so much cleaning and straightening up one can do (again, not my idea of fun).

I had upstairs duty, Yahoo, there's a computer. While looking up writer stuff, I chatted with one of my favorite aunts. I found out that she no longer has one of my dad's (her brother) paintings. She wants one and asks if I have any to spare. I have some of course. I am past positive and a bit of a hoarder. Most of the things I find of value are for sentimental reasons. I have an extra surprise for her. Our grandmother, her mom, also painted and I have one of hers. She told me she doesn't have any of her mom's paintings. I am sending it to her. Her sentimental value is greater than mine. I wouldn't feel right keeping it. I love her, and all our silly memories of summers in Vermont. I would feel mean if I hung onto this prize.

This is the one she chose.

This painting is mine. I only showed it to her to tease. I do that sometimes. :)

This is the Extra, she didn't know I had.

Working that third shift became something special - but it gets better. I got to spend the next afternoon with my husband. We had dinner together on a Monday night, a rare treat because normally he works first and I work second shift. Uh oh, the dreaded phone ring - another third shift couldn't be filled. Same routine, same result. I wasn't too thrilled. I reminded myself that the universe is good. God loves me, this I know. I packed my bag with books and projects because this night I would be down stairs with no access to a computer.

I managed to get two of my picture book stories edited to near perfection. I just need a second opinion now, because sometimes my definition of perfect doesn't agree with an editor or publisher. Feed back, it's a good thing!

I have been toying with the idea of doing some of my own illustrations. If nothing else, I had fun. When one of the boys woke up at 5am he was good enough to have a look see. It was so very nice of him to be excited about what I was doing. He asked to see what I drew. He is, in part, the inspiration for this particular story and gave me some good plot advice when I read the first draft to him last week.

The funny thing is, He is great at art. I compliment him often. I started to undermine my drawings, afraid of his opinion. Guess what? He gave me back some of my own advice. He smiled as he said "Don't put yourself down." He pointed out some things that I can do that he still needs to learn. The teacher and student are often interchangeable, don't you agree?

There is a reason that one of my favorite sayings is "Take my advice, I'm not using it."

I'm getting better though. If I am constantly telling others to love themselves, I had better model that same behavior, don't ya think?

Education is the KEY

2010-12-26T10:25:00.000-05:00

Prevent Child Abuse America
312.663.3520 tel
312.939.8962 fax
www.preventchildabuse.org

Twelve Alternatives to Lashing Out at Your Child

The next time everyday pressures build up to the point where you feel like lashing out -- STOP!

Try any of these simple alternatives. You'll feel better... and so will your child.

• Take a deep breath... and another. Then remember you are the adult.
• Close your eyes and imagine you're hearing what your child is about to hear.
• Press your lips together and count to 10... or better yet, to 20.
• Put your child in a time-out chair (remember this rule: one time-out minute for each year
of age.)
• Put yourself in a time-out chair. Think about why you are angry: is it your child, or is
your child simply a convenient target for your anger?
• Phone a friend.
• If someone can watch the children, go outside and take a walk.
• Take a hot bath or splash cold water on your face.
• Hug a pillow.
• Turn on some music.Maybe even sing along.
• Pick up a pencil and write down as many helpful words as you can think of. Save the list.
• Call for prevention information: 1-800-CHILDREN

CHRISTMAS !!!

2010-12-18T07:57:00.001-05:00

Call me a liar, it's ok - I know that I tell stories.

I have all kinds of friends who believe all kinds of things. Sometimes they seem to get upset at me for what I believe but that's ok. Thank God, we get to choose. I do believe in God. I admit that I don't have it all figured out. I don't know that anyone does. I do know that I am not worshiping idols when I put this on top of my hutch. It's a DECORATION that honors God. I am not talking to it. I do however talk to my animals and I think God is ok with that. I will find out later, I suppose, if I am wrong about that.

I have an atheist friend who thinks people who believe in God are stupid. He once stated that believing in God is like believing in Santa Claus. Of course I had to go and think about that for a long time before I came up with my conclusion. I have decided that YES, I do believe in Santa Claus. If you look it up you will find that he once was REAL. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Saint_Nicholas I love Google and Wikipedia they make "looking it up" so easy for the semi-lazy. The great thing about St. Nicholas (aka Santa Claus) is that he did what Jesus said was very difficult (probably why they made him a saint). He was born into wealth and saw what really mattered. He gave in secret to others less fortunate to bring them happiness. Maybe those who received gave to others less fortunate than themselves and so on and so on.....what a revolution!

These clothes pin ornaments were made by me and my siblings when we were kids. I remember the fun we had making them. This one is a personal favorite for some reason.
They hang on my Christmas tree (a German custom that I think God is ok with as long as we don't worship the tree and ask it for favors, or guidance.) I am guessing here, I could be wrong.

Oops, I only have two out of three wise men. I was thinking maybe the third one is stuck at the mall buying gifts. I hope he doesn't over do it because from what I can remember it wasn't the gifts that made Christmas so special. Happy Holidays Everyone - how ever you celebrate.

The Truth about Christmas!

2010-12-10T07:29:00.000-05:00

Ok, call me a liar if you will but I love the fantasy and fun of Santa Claus. When I was four years old I remember pretending to be asleep on Christmas eve so I could get a glimpse of Santa. I heard and saw my parents taking the presents from their bedroom closet. I wasn't too disappointed about finding out that my parent's were liars. I knew they loved me. I also now knew where their secret hiding place was. Nothing good could come of that!

I remember when my youngest brother was about three or four, which means I was nine or ten, and he was questioning whether or not Santa was real. I felt bad for him because there didn't seem to be enough magic and fantasy having older siblings who already knew the TRUTH, the boring old TRUTH. I showed him a picture of Santa Claus in the encyclopedia. He wasn't old enough to read the words so my saying "would he be in the encyclopedia if he wasn't real?" really held some weight. This allowed him to have the fun of believing maybe one more year or so. I don't remember him being upset with me for my lie.

I remember another Christmas when I was older, around eleven, I think. We gathered around that closet and my sister, the oldest, carefully unwrapped and re-wrapped each gift so we could see what we were getting. I remember not wanting to know. I liked the SURPRISE of it all. The only thing I had asked for that year was an aluminum tennis racket and it wasn't there. I moped a bit thinking that nobody loved me. I was quite a martyr at that age - I cringe just thinking about my feel sorry for me days. I think sometimes that I enjoyed being miserable as much as I enjoyed being happy. That Christmas morning what to my wondering eyes should appear? It was THE tennis racket unwrapped except for a beautiful red bow. My mother hid it in the roll away bed because she had no intention of wrapping it. I got the surprise of not knowing what gifts I was getting as well. Apparently I always get what I want!

Fast forward to me being an adult with a child of my own. I love buying gifts. I love the magic of the holidays. I love making Santa as real as possible for my little girl. We leave cookies for him and fruit for the reindeer. I even made foot prints from the wood stove and out in the snow one year. Ok, so maybe I got a little carried away with the making him real thing.

My daughter came home from school one day when she was about nine or ten. She was a bit upset. "The other kids said that Santa isn't real." she told me and then here is the killer - "I told them my mother wouldn't lie." OOPS, I thought that she knew the truth and was just playing along. I told her as gently as I could that Santa or St.Nicholas was real long ago but that yes, the presents came from her dad and I. She was not thrilled with me and asked "I suppose this means the Easter Bunny is a lie, as well? What other lies are you telling me?" It was a rough day to say the least - but she knew that I loved her.
I noticed how my daughter grew up not liking being lied to. She is a tough cookie to fool. I think this is a very good thing. She forgives me my lies and knows that I let her believe what she wants. Oh don't forget, whatever you do, however you celebrate, don't forget to let your children know that you love them!
Happy Holidays Everyone!

Happy Thanksgiving

2010-11-24T09:28:00.000-05:00

I am so excited! I love being thankful. I love food. I love to cook. I love having family and friends around. Wow, this holiday is perfect for me! Did you ever notice how LOVE and Thankfulness seem to go hand in hand?

I don't remember how young I was when I learned to cook. I do remember the comet and ketchup cake my sister and I were so proud of. Don't worry folks, my combinations have improved over the years. My food tends to be edible. I still think cooking is fun! It never was a chore to me. I didn't learn how to cook from a book but that is possible if you are not as fortunate as I was. I had parents who taught me things and allowed me to experiment. I don't even remember getting in trouble for the comet and ketchup cake. I think my parents laughed about it, and understood our intent. I am forever thankful for them.

Anyone who REALLY knows me, also knows that I am not a big fan of rules. Well, rules that don't make sense, that is. Safety makes sense. Rules around safety are ok with me. Rules that are really just about someone wanting to dominate, take total control, and make others do things their way for their own benefit bother me. That is probably why I find myself taking the time to explain rules to children instead of just barking at them to do what I say - just because I say so. Adults I have less patience with, sorry. I am trying to improve.

Ok kids now is your time to shine. Just remember cook food others can eat, follow the rules that make sense, and above all else, HAVE FUN!!!!!
Have a Happy Thanksgiving everyone who celebrates it!

I wasn't paying attention!

2010-11-08T09:09:00.000-05:00

Why didn't any little birdies tell me?

I woke up this Monday morning to find snow on the ground. I didn't expect this!

I know I wasn't the one who manifested it. Don't blame me. I didn't wish for it.

I can't have picnics or take bike rides in the snow. Uh oh, I said CAN'T - that makes my brain go into now I have to try it mode. Guess that means I will be having a picnic lunch right after my slushy bike ride today.

I look all around. It really is beautiful (especially when I don't have to drive in it).

Plus, it's just a little Martha Stewart type aesthetic dusting. Which is perfect because it's a Monday. The kids have school.

So now I am glad that it's not snow man snow.

LOOK! Bay is eating frosted wheat.

Seriously she says "Can I come inside and play, it's cold out here today."

What does it mean?

2010-11-05T10:09:00.000-04:00

Any one who knows me, knows that I like strange things.
I also like to find meanings or sayings for the out of the ordinary happenings.

Today is my lucky day. Woo hoo!!!

When I went to gather eggs I got this......

Of course I immediately feel guilty thinking Oh no, I'm doing something wrong, not feeding them enough of something.....
I attribute this way of thinking to my Catholic upbringing - I often think everything is my fault, don't worry folks, recognizing this helps me to quickly change my thoughts and not sink into despair. I looked it up and found that it's not my fault - just an oddity that happens every now and then.
So now that the guilt is gone I can have fun with finding meaning or a saying....
How about "inner beauty is important but lets not forget the shell, that's important too" ?

ok so that's not everything. I'm sitting at the computer and I see the horse and the goat run past the window. All my animals are escape artists so that is not so surprising. I went outside because they were obviously looking for more attention and this is what I found......

Ok so I am thinking When the gift horse drinks from the wishing well, that's gotta mean something, no?

Spider cupcakes

2010-11-02T12:25:00.000-04:00

My friend Melanie came over for dinner last weekend. I got confused and thought that she was coming Saturday, but it was Friday. Oops!

I was at Pumpkintown. Apparently, I really did lose my head, well, my brains, anyway.

I was not prepared. I am thankful everyone was happy with the pizza I ordered.

I was going to bake a fantastic cake, but of course I didn't.

The big surprise is that Melanie, although she was told not to bring a thing, gifted us with the most scrumptious spider cupcakes.

She made these! Aren't they AWESOME?

They were a big hit!

Damien was more intrigued with Melanie and the games on her phone.

Aries was obviously impressed.

Win knows he is the luckiest man alive - he has Melanie!

I am blessed to have friends, and family that except me as I am, mistakes and all. Wait a minute.....that's "accept" - see what I mean?

Haunted House?

2010-10-28T10:56:00.000-04:00

Mark Twain is one of my favorite authors. Why wouldn't he be? He said "A person who won't read has no advantage over a one who can't read." My sentiments exactly.

You can imagine my excitement when my daughter surprised us with tickets to the Mark Twain haunted house tour.

I love ghosts, and I love Mark Twain.

I believe that there is something true about the existence of ghosts. I am not sure how, why, or what. In the words of Mark Twain "It ain't what you don't know that gets you into trouble. It's what you know for sure that just ain't so."

I grew up in a house built in the 1700's - was it haunted? My sister claims she saw a man in a top hat walking down the stairs once. I believe her. She often asked me to come upstairs with her by saying "I have something to tell you". I caught on that she was just peeking my curiosity so she wouldn't have to go upstairs alone. I figured this out when she would start her fantastic gossip she claimed to have for me with "hmmmm , hesitation and eyes looking upward searching for a thought. I guess I was just more curious than scared. Wait a minute...that philosophy could account for a lot of my seemingly, bad decisions in life. I say seemingly bad because if you learn from your mistakes they aren't bad decisions anymore, but lessons in life.

We also used to tease my youngest brother about old man Michael, the ghost we made up. It's kind of ironic that now,one of my bosses at work, is named Micheal and he is a ghost hunter (I am not sure why he needs to hunt ghosts and what he does with them when he catches one, guess I should ask). Michael claims that the house I work at is haunted, that in some of his recordings the ghosts were saying my name. I assured him that I have one of "those names" - sometimes when cows moo it sounds like my name. Go ahead try it. Moo like a cow and say my name. See what I mean? I just don't think it is anything to be scared of.

The house tour was awesome. I especially love the solarium. The first time I saw this house was as a child in elementary school. I remember thinking " I am going to have a solarium when I grow up". I told my husband not to waste money on jewelry. I would rather have a solarium. I know I will - someday! I can imagine B&B guests eating breakfast in the solarium that will be off of the kitchen, where the stone patio is now.

We heard a lot of interesting stories, about all the ghosts that different people experienced at the Mark Twain house. We didn't see, hear, or feel any ghosts - we smelled tobacco smoke but there are lots of explanations for that, not necessarily a ghost.

Something strange did happen when we went down to the basement. One of the people in the group let out a little scream. I felt curious, but not afraid. It turned out that a baby squirrel decided to come out of the cold and join our tour. Wait a minute......maybe I should have been scared. After all it's the squirrels who are going to take over the earth. I saw it in a movie once, so I know it must be true.

Sorry there weren't more pictures but the ghosts that we didn't see, hear, or feel must have sucked all the power out of my camera battery.

Now here is something to be scared of - Poverty!

In the words of Mark Twain "The lack of money is the root of all evil."

(Don't let this man fool you. He is bent but he is not broke. Get it? It's Eric. Our last name is Bender.)

Change

2010-10-27T11:12:00.001-04:00

I know that I am different from most people. Most people fear change. Don't they realize that change is the one thing I can count on? With a little help I changed our ice house into a play house and chicken coop.

I like the change.

The weather is changing but my chickens keep giving me just as many, if not more eggs than I expect. This is what they look like before I wash them. You gotta take the poop with the shine folks or you will never make it on a farm or in life.

Here are our latest new additions. The kids were over yesterday and helped to name them. We decided to call them Lucy and Ethel. Can you guess which one is Lucy and which is Ethel?

Sometimes change involves saying goodbye. One Rooster is enough. Four is going to be trouble.
The roosters , two pigs and the male goat are going to a friend tomorrow (funny, he just called as I was writing this). We are planning to get a female goat who doesn't have horns. The horse needs a companion that won't poke her in the eye when it is having boundary issues. Something to keep in mind folks when you are looking for a companion. Be nice or leave that is our motto here.

Linked to White Wednesday

Sun is shining

2010-10-23T10:21:00.001-04:00

The sun is shining. Who wants to play - outside?

Bay, the horse and Melvin, the goat are more than willing to roam out of the barn.

You don't have to tell my chickens twice. When I open the hatch they burst out.

Ahhh, semi-freedom! They are content.

Until they see the sign that is.......then they realize that a little fence can't keep them in...they have wings....they can fly. I like to think my chickens can read, just because I would like everyone to be able to read, and I have a very vivid imagination.

They escape to have more fun because nobody likes to feel cooped up or fenced in when the sun is shining bright. Of course they appreciate their coop at night. It's dark and colder then. The coyotes, skunks, and raccoons come out. Things can get ugly for a chicken then. That is why they always come back.

Momma cat says "I don't know what all the fuss is about." and in typical cat fashion she chooses to sit and is perfectly content to do nothing (for the moment). She enjoys the sun and the moon, taking little naps in between so she doesn't miss a thing.

2010-10-14T10:31:00.000-04:00

Halloween is my favorite holiday.
If you read up on it, you will see that it is nothing to fear. Actually there is NOTHING to fear, but fear itself. You've heard it before but you need to BELIEVE it!

To me Halloween is a magical time for Pumpkins, Cats and............

CROWS!

A time for spooky things, that are not really spooky at all.

It's fun when you know that there is REALLY nothing to fear!

Most of all, I love the fun of Halloween. Children dressed in costumes they helped decide. Giggles and laughter over the excitement of running door to door receiving CANDY. Oh the memories of days gone by and the ones waiting to be created.

I don't believe that it is against God to have the kind of fun that brings this much joy to children. When I was a child I went trick or treating. I have to admit I did worship the candy, but I never put it above God. I thank God that I live in a world where I can decide what makes sense and put things in the proper perspective.

Live, Laugh, LOVE! No harm in that!

My favorite quote from the Bible - John 10:10 (the words of Jesus) " The thief cometh not, but for to steal, and to kill, and to destroy; I am come that they might have life, and that they might have it more abundantly".

I am thinking - Lots and Lots of CANDY - to be eaten in moderation, of course. :)

Exploring new worlds

2010-10-11T13:03:00.001-04:00

In honor of Columbus day I decided to go explore.

Maybe find a new world, right in my own backyard.

I walked to where the little pond is. This looks like a strange and wonderful new world. Everything looks different. Lots less water now than in Spring.

This would make an excellent seat for a fairy princess, I thought.

I love the way moss looks, so green, my favorite color. Look at all the different forms of life here - could it be it's own little world?

This striped rock and pretty leaf remind me of all the decorating and painting going on in our family right now. It's nice to see that mother nature decorates too.

I fell in love with this piece of bark. I know that sounds strange. I am strange. I am ok with that. I collect strange things like acorns, bark, feathers, anything that I think looks beautiful. I decided to take this piece of bark home with me.

Then I realized that this bark is home to someone else. A slug who was very busy exploring too.

I enjoyed watching him glide along. I say HIM but the slug is really both a him and a her. Slugs are hermaphrodites.
I learned that from reading about slugs when I got home.

If you want to know more about the slug you will probably enjoy this site I found. http://www.backyardnature.net/snail_sl.htm

I wondered what the slug was thinking.

The slug made it to the other side. I wonder if that was it's intent or just an accident.

and there he/she goes, off to explore new worlds too. I wonder if it knew my theme for today.

Laughter - it's the best medicine!!!!

2010-10-06T07:28:00.000-04:00

I can laugh at myself. I don't mind and usually enjoy when others laugh at me. Usually I am trying to make them laugh. There are a few occasions when I don't find laughter funny.

That is when the laughter is directed at one another out of hate. I can however laugh at people who are doing things that are hateful knowing that what goes around comes around.

As far back as I can remember I always want to protect the underdog. The other day I felt like the underdog.

When I went to work (a therapeutic group home) on Sunday and spoke to one of the boys about his weekend he asked about mine in return.

I said "It was great, I went shopping to buy new pants. I jokingly told him my husband noticed I had a rip in a pair and my underwear was showing." The boy said "I know, the tan pants, so and so (my co-worker that Thursday night) was laughing and pointing it out to the boys."

I laughed even after the boy told me the color of my underwear - Oh heck, you might as well know too, they were pink. Hey, it's breast cancer awareness month so pink underwear is something to be proud of!

I laughed and used this as a teaching moment by saying "Wow, nice people let you know when there is something like that, instead of laughing at you, they let you know so you can do something about it. Ya know like if there is broccoli in between your teeth?!"

The boy agreed and we talked about how adults can be bullies or have problems/issues too.

I am a boss who has a boss, who has a boss, who has a boss and then there maybe one or two more before reaching the top of the chain of command. I am the administrator who is also in the front line so to speak. It's good to know what is going on.

I don't get mad. I don't get even. I try to educate. I think I have my job cut out for me and I am not talking about the boys!

Day of Escape

2010-10-01T15:23:00.000-04:00

Ever have one of those days?

I let Bay out to play.....and thought " I could use a little escape myself ".

I often listen to Jessica Prouty Band's song by this title. Can you relate? http://search.yahoo.com/search?ei=UTF-8&fr=crmas&p=Jessica+Prouty+Band+Escape

It didn't take me long to decide where I was going. I usually prefer libraries and used book stores. Today I wanted to see what is New on the shelves.

I indulged one of my addictions - we all have them, just rarely admit to them. I am addicted to magazines. I love turning those glossy pages. I know that I can find this same information on the internet but there is just something about those pages. Maybe it is the control freak in me (part of my dark side) but I also like to possess the material in hard copy. It's not enough for me to see it on the internet. I need to touch it. Go ahead analyze me - I don't care!

Another pleasure of mine is buying gifts. I call this a pleasure because I don't think you can call something nice you do for others an addiction. I suppose if I was spending money I didn't have on gifts people didn't want, it could be an addiction. Don't worry folks that is not the case here.

This book looks like a gift for someone young but it's for ME. I love Roald Dahl books. I've read them all. This is something NEW!!!! I am so happy and grateful - who Knew I would find this kind of New?

I had to drive by Munson's chocolates on my way home. My car automatically pulled into their parking lot while Natalie Imbruglia's One More Addiction played on the radio

http://s0.ilike.com/play#Natalie+Imbruglia:One+More+Addiction:117319:s6928710.8082683.4741211.0.1.88%2Cstd_f8f467200b571a14c096cf46a77e7c51

OK - that's a lie. My radio doesn't really work but sometimes things like that really do happen. :)
Telling stories - another addiction of mine.

Some goodies for the grandchildren. Maybe that is why I love Roald Dahl so much. I think he and I share the same passions. If you have read any of his stories you will know what I mean. I know he is no longer on this Earth but I can't speak of him in past tense.

Sweet indulgence! Sophisticated chocolates like this deserve to be hidden and savored. MAYBE, just MAYBE, I will take them out of hiding to share with guests.

Ahhh, just what the doctor ordered. I feel totally in alignment again!

Bay came running back when I returned. It's good to be home too!

Fairy Tales

2010-09-21T07:46:00.000-04:00

There are times when I feel like I am living in a fairy tale. I thank Eric and God for that.

For some odd reason I keep thinking about ...

The Musicians of Bremen....

Sometimes things are not always what they seem.

But I think if our intentions are pure (as in wanting what is best through LOVE not control) things will always work out.The highest will prevails.

Someday my fairytale room or book lovers room (does the label really matter?) will be finished. I think it is going to be my favorite room in the house.

Writing on the walls

2010-09-10T22:51:00.000-04:00

Can you see the writing on the walls? These two adorable children (two of my grandchildren) did not do it. I am in the process of helping my daughter and her family renovate this house to be their new home. This will be my granddaughter's room. We tried in vain to prime, once with white primer, and then with grey primer to paint over this rendition of Sponge Bob. We are guessing it's Sponge Bob and his friends. We started to refer to him as bleeding Sponge Bob, because the picture kept coming through no matter what we did.

It got me thinking. Oh no! I thought about the writing or drawing on the cave walls during prehistoric times. I was thinking how primitive - to write on walls today when we now have paper, (and sidewalk chalk if you want to get back to your primal self). This thought was probably caused by my wanting the bleeding Sponge Bob to go away - plus I really like Martha Stewart and she would probably think something like that too. I am usually not that picky about things but there are times when I can get my Martha on, then watch out!

My two adorable grandchildren started to write on my porch trunk table today, with crayon. OOPS!
I never get bent out of shape. I am a Bender who likes to stay calm and go with the flow. No need to yell, I just got them some paper. I will clean the crayon off later. Thank God for the magic eraser and the person who invented that thing too, of course. God doesn't do EVERYTHING, and I believe that we rarely do great things without God. It's a team effort.

So now I am thinking again. Oh No! This is starting to be like the theme for the day or something. I wonder if maybe the cave drawings were drawings some cave children made? The more advanced cave children - the odd ones.

There are many theories regarding child development.

I tend to lean toward the cognitive behavior theories. I think that children know more than some adults. I think that a lot of what they know gets kinda beat out of them by ego driven people who think that the material world is the be all and the end all, or that there is only one truth, when in fact there are many truths and it is all a matter of perspective.

If you have ever worked with or loved an autistic child you may know what I am talking about. They may think and react to things differently but who are we to judge it as WRONG.

When I worked at the South Windsor Safe home I did some drawing on walls myself.

The safe home is no longer open for business because of budget cuts blah blah blah. When I bumped into one of my favorite safe home buddies, Susan, the other day she mentioned how sad it will be if one of the children we cared for tries to stop in to say "hi" and we are not there. Good thing Alice, the program director, thought to start a safe home page. The kids today are so computer savvy. I am sure they will find us if they desire.

Thanks Alice. I was wondering - if I win the lottery maybe Alice would like to run a new program for me? I've been thinking of a really great idea that is soooo needed in CT. The state on the bottom of the list for happy states, not the VERY bottom, at least we are not as unhappy as NY.

Playing B&B instead of D&D

2010-08-15T14:18:00.001-04:00

This is Eric, my husband, also know as Captain Chaos at times. Doesn't he look like the proprietor of a B&B? We are renovating our little farm with that purpose in mind. Our goal date is 2013, or sooner, God willing, so this weekend we were kind of pretending to be open for business since we had friends and relatives over for fun.

There were princesses - can we say that we entertained royalty, in our ads?

Children large and small playing in the garden, just like I envision for the future.

Will he always be looking at hoes like this?

No corn maze yet, but when you are this age a few rows of corn and your vivid imagination can be an adventure.

Friends, Kim, Win, & Melanie, conversing on the porch.

Cousin Chris....

his lovely wife, Katherine.....

and the boys in the band....Cam, Cody, and Andy....

the Jessica Prouty Band! They will be famous, and we can say 'they slept here'. I envision all types of artists staying with us in the future.

I let Aries, my three year old granddaughter, take some pictures.....

Something strange is going on.....

Do you think... bringing all those antiques into the house....

Maybe it's haunted now?

Maybe - maybe not, guess it depends on what you believe....

Aries moves a lot when she takes photos, plus the fan was blowing some cold air....

"I don't know", laughs Captain Chaos, "Could that be GOOD for business?"

I guess it all depends on what kind of guests we want to have.....I am trying not to be judgmental.

As long as we are all having fun, it's legal and nobody pokes an eye out....it's all good.